Victim

The Victim types, identified as such by Viktor Gulenko, are the four types with Ni symbol_t.gif in their ego, two each in Beta and Gamma: EIE, IEI, LIE, and ILI.

Despite the differences between these types in terms of temperament, base function, and quadra values, it seems that in the area of physical attraction, desire, and flirting, the Ego <Ego> element Ni symbol_t.gif, coupled with their expectations of Se symbol_f.gif style behavior in intimate partners, is the most visible factor in a Victim’s behavior.

Typical characteristics of the Victim romance style

  • prone to initial doubts about intensity of own interest in another person

  • not always confident about revealing that interest

  • inclined to focus on whether or not the other person might reciprocate the interest

  • inclined to question whether or not the other person’s interest will remain constant with time

  • preference for partners that provoke in the individual a certain sense of awe in terms of power, physical presence, and the like

  • appreciation for the sense of power-play present when interacting with such partners, with acceptance of a slight sense of superiority on the part of the partner, without ever actually “submitting” to them

  • this takes the form of the individual somewhat expecting the partner to be “mean” on occasion

  • in the case of Victim males with female partners, this latter trait assumes a characteristic analogous to a “knight devoted to his princess”

  • inclination to openly admit to a relationship having been ended by the partner rather than by the individual himself

This romance style is defined by focus on symbol_t.gif which is dynamic, irrational, and introverted, with perceptions of inner imagery away from the present physical reality. This means that a Victim sees attraction between two individuals as a dynamic state, which he feels is completely natural. This accounts for a Victim’s inclination to focus on the mutual attraction, or particularly the attraction felt by the other person, as to its longer-term perspectives and implications, as well as a certain expectation that the partner will continuously take action to confirm the attraction. Failure on the partner to do so results on the individual assuming that it’s already changing. The individual counts on the partner to forcefully bring the individual “down to earth from his thoughts ” and focus on the immediate physical reality, continuously.

Perception of other romance styles

This refers to perceptions of the partner in a romantic or prospective relationship.

Aggressor: Victims tend to perceive Aggressors as pleasantly reassuring, providing direct unequivocal signals to their interests and intents, given to taking concrete actions and initiatives to meet their goals. They find Aggressor’s conscious realization of their sexual desires to be attractive and reflecting positively on their own level of romantic motivation.

Victim: Victims tend to perceive other Victims as puzzling, evasive, even non-committal, not giving them clear signals and given to playing “waiting” and “push-pull” games that slow down relationship development, but also as exciting partners if a certain stage of “certainty” is finally reached. Courting of two Victims types resemble attempts to make the other adopt Aggressor behavior or to patiently wait out until the other person does so on their own.

Caring: Victims tend to perceive Caring types as a reassuring, supportive, smooth and stable presence in their life, but also somewhat dull and monotonous. The excessive attention of Caring type to Victim’s needs and statements is confusing and irritating to the Victim type. Caring type’s inclination to safeguard and protect Victim types from life’s troubles is at first appreciated and viewed as supportive, but eventually as intrusive and unnecessary.

Childlike: Victims tend to perceive Childlike types as interesting, refreshing, and captivating in intellectual sense, but ultimately too focused on mental explorations and idle talk in absence of any realistic initiatives. In everyday life, Victims may see Childlike types as too demanding and capricious, expecting too much care that Victims find exhausting to provide; Victim women are prone to seeing Childlike men not capable of providing solid support and concrete initiatives as well as slightly irritating.

Description from Life Scenarios by V. Gulenko

“Victim” man (ILI, LIE, EIE, IEI). Idealizes a commanding woman. Adapts to her tastes, respects volitional qualities in her. In his behavior at times he emphasizes dependence and obedience, and other times comes out of control. In relationship with a woman he subconsciously awaits orders, catches, reprimands. Not receiving these kinds of reactions, he involuntarily provokes their manifestation.

“Victim” woman (ILI, LIE, EIE, IEI). The ideal of this woman is a physically strong man, reminiscent of lead roles in action movies. She wishes to experience his force on herself, to resist his pressure, to feel herself a victim. In love games, she prefers different forms of opposition and confrontation, that fuel the passions of her partner. Women of this type sometimes have inherent masochistic traits, though not all of them consciously acknowledge it.

“Victim” woman cleverly plays on her weakness, vulnerability, or disorganization, thus provoking “Aggressive” man to undertake prompt decisive actions. In love games, the greatest value for her are strong embraces and feeling the power of the male body, yielding to which she shows her submission to his will. “Caring” men seem comfortable to her, but too dull partners, while “Childlike” men in her heart she views as not sufficiently strong and resolute. With similar to her “Victim” men this woman enters into complex, full of subtext relations, competing with them in sacrificial attitudes and demanding for it special privileges. Frequently such games literally wear out and exhaust both of them.

At this point, I consider it necessary to mention that these psychoanalytic groups are not being considered in all detail, so some more subtle differences within them disappear. In particular, among “Victim” types the fact remains unnoticed that they can further be divided into the “tragic victims” (IEI and EIE) and “comic victims” (ILI and LIE).